Do not stop feeling. Do not stop owning your heart and knowing your heart. This is where wisdom is made! When you say that you forgive, in order to still remain in control—you lose. You cannot remain in control of someone else’s heart, and expect forgiveness. Forgiveness is not saying that what you did was ok; because maybe it wasn’t, maybe what they did was excruciating and terrible, perhaps unfathomable. Forgiveness is not excusing that behavior. It is realizing that you have been gifted with a life that should not be controlled by that persons actions. It is setting yourself free, so that you can move on, and move through healing. Its understanding that you can not control someone’s emotions, and to try to do so would keep you unhealthily tied to them, bringing death to your heart.
Forgiveness is freeing yourself, which in turn frees your heart, which gifts someone else with the chance to embark on a journey of healing, seeking wholeness and fullness to their broken world as well. Forgiveness is emotional. You cannot forgive without feeling the necessary emotions, which lead you to letting go of being controlled by pain.
